Before a couple weeks ago, it had been a long time since I’d posted on here. Well… besides the occasional picture post. But otherwise, nothing. I just never had anything to say; there wasn’t anything that I felt was important enough to post about. It’s not that there wasn’t anything happening in my life – quite the contrary. Just, what was happening wasn’t good for the blog – or me.
“Two steps forward, and three steps back” is how I’d describe my life over the past couple months. No… years, actually. At first it was in little things; things that most Christians are fine with. As I became more comfortable with those I’d take more steps backwards, camouflaged by the steps forward. And so the pattern continued.
Family and close friends are wonderful – they never let you go down without a fight. Their fight over me was fought on their knees, in prayer. Sure, some shared their thoughts with me; they let me know what they thought about the path I was headed down; they even told me that they, and some of their (and my) closest friends were praying for me. But I still didn’t have a clue about how many people were actually praying.
The changes were small at first. Really just changes to moral issues I had. But as I tried to “clean up” my life by myself, the Lord taught me that on my own I can only a fail – that the only way to have true victory over my life and my sin is through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.
I’m very thankful for friends and family who care enough and love me enough to pray. I’ll never underestimate the power of the prayers of the righteous.
In my last post I talked about being afraid to move forward in my life – but I’ve had a realization since then (I do a lot of thinking when I’m at work). I may need to eventually be somewhere (e.g. teaching music) but that may not be where I’m supposed to be right now. Right now the Lord has me doing construction. It may not be my absolute most favorite job and I may never make something of it, but it’s where the Lord has me.
So, right now I’m learning to be patient. I’m also learning how to interact with people who are nothing like me, and have absolutely no similar interests. But most importantly, I’m learning how to rest in the Lord and rely on what He knows is best for me.
I was in my room the other day and was just looking around when a framed picture, that has hung in my room ever since I moved into the room, caught my eye. It’s a picture of three cowboys riding their horses over some rough terrain. Written in the corner of the picture is Proverbs 3:5, 6 – “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.” (NKJV)
I was reminded that no matter how much planning I do for my life, it’s all in vain unless I trust the Lord to direct my life. If I’m trusting Him, then my plans will be the same His plans – that being the case, there’s no need to worry about it.